Surrender (Not Half Surrender) and Inquiry - 16th August 2016

It is talking before Satsang started and you're looking to see whether I can do the inquiry a little bit and to see who is the witness of thoughts and feelings. And sometimes it's just seemed like no, there is no fire and no power in it. So then when I asked, so the only two options basically: either we look together and see who you are, or you leave everything to me. Then she just left everything to me. Now it's a contract case. Put some light.

Now, many variations of half-surrender that I used to speak about earlier, maybe I can share a little bit before we get into the inquiry. One is that you are now the doer—you, God, Guru, Self, whatever, are now the doer—but I am still the experiencer. You see, this may be the most popular form of half-surrender. Yeah, it cannot be that the doer and experiencer are two. It must be that you are the doer and you are also the experiencer. As it is said in the scriptures in India, it is 'Twam Karta, Twam Bhokta.' So this is one form of half-surrender.

We say to God that, 'Yes, yes, I leave everything to you, but please make sure that I'm well taken care of.' You see, that is more like a business deal rather than surrender. It must be that I leave everything to you; do with me as you please. 'Let thy will be done.' It is not a way to get my will to be done by saying that I am offering up everything to you as a way of getting my will to be done. So, let thy will be done. So this is one version. Now you say that you are the doer, but make sure my experience is a certain way, the way I want it to be.

And this many times you at least used to hear these things in Satsang where somebody would say, 'But I surrendered everything to you, but now look at my life.' You see, yes, but it is no longer your life because you surrendered everything. And the other variety is where all the good things I am still doing, and all the bad things God is doing to me. You see now? So this happens where we are attracted to pride in some way. So everything good that is happening is, 'Oh, I worked so hard and got this done,' but, 'You know, why did you have to do this to me, God? Everything was going so well.' Either so all the blame is God's and all the credit is yours—the quote-unquote 'yours.' That is one version.

The other ones who are attracted to guilt and unworthiness, they will take on all the blame. All the blame will be there, and all the credit goes to the world or to God or to Guru. You see, even that is not... even that is half-surrender because otherwise then we retain this doer-victim mindset. You see? So all these variations—and there could be a few more—but these are the main ones. You are the doer and you are the experiencer, so let thy will be done. All actions are yours, all inaction is also yours. Every single movement of a blade of grass is yours. You see, every emotion is yours, every sensation is yours.