Life is Just Happening as Life - 12th April 2016

So life is moving in real time. It is the mind which is trying to do the translation, the subtitling, you see. And if you're living with that interpretation of what life is like, then it's like leading a secondhand life. Secondhand. The mind's version of what my life is, is called suffering. Pretending to lead the mind's version of what my life is, is called suffering. I like the definition, actually; it just came for the first time today. Like this, we see that life is just what it is in this moment. There's so much joy. Even if you were to just explore it objectively, you will find, look at this: we are in a room in the middle of Bangalore somewhere now, and there are beings from all over the world who have come like this, and we just met somewhere, sometime, and some connection happened and we are here, and we're in Satsang. You see, like this is so beautiful, isn't it? But this is even happening like this. Like this, there is so much wonder available even like this to contemplate.

But it's even more wonderful when even these ideas are dropped in the now, which is, 'Wow, this body is still here without even these ideas that this body of Ananta is still here.' Still this voice is like this, it sounds like this. There's so much to enjoy in this realm in every moment. Even when tears are coming, something that enjoys even this, like the taste, different taste, contrast. So there is nothing in this realm which consciousness is not enjoying. This is like going to different types of movies, you see. I love superhero movies, you know, but can I watch one every day? No, probably. Can I watch every moment of the day? No. If I was watching superheroes all of the time, then I would say, 'Maybe give me a nice comedy, give me some...' This is what happens. So like this, every contrast is enjoyed here.

But if you go with the mind's version, it's always saying, 'But you're making your life a mess.' Or it's saying, 'You're doing such a great job, you're too good, you're too good.' It is either pride or guilt, either pride or humility. Either way, feeling too good, too good, or too bad, too bad. This neutrality which comes with this sense of wonder goes missing when we follow the mind's version of what life is. Because everything, even now, it can be sitting and picking and choosing, 'Yeah, this one, this... yeah, he's being very funny today. Yeah, this is good, good.' You know, something is... you see this? You can notice even in Satsang how it tries to be your friend and help you with what is happening in the Satsang. We don't need its help. In fact, it is only confusing you.

I often say that I am saying ABC, ABC, ABC; the mind is saying XYZ, XYZ, whatever you call it, you see. And that's why it happens so many times where someone comes and says, 'You said this in the Satsang yesterday,' and I have two types of trouble with that. One is I hardly remember what was said in Satsang, and the second is what they are saying many times feels like it never left these lips. It never feels like it came from there. Many times it hadn't been spoken like that. Why do we remember something seemingly that this mouth had said but never left this mouth? Because we are also listening to what our mind is saying about what I am saying. 'Like this is good, let's keep this,' you know. 'He was saying this one...' He's just something, you see, always trying to participate even now. And this is how... this is what I mean by secondhand life. Life is just happening as life, but we buy the interpretations from the mind about life, you see.

Because if we were not buying this interpretation, nobody could ever say, 'My life is so messed up.' Nobody can ever say, 'My life is messed up' or 'is terrible,' because just to have life is such joy, is great wonder. Just to have this, even this body which is such a beautiful instrument, is breathing, is digesting, blood is flowing. How many mechanisms are happening in this body to just have this gift of this body present? Even if it is ill, it is amazing. You cannot say it's such a terrible life unless you are going with this mind's interpretation. Just we exist. I exist. Isn't that such a wonder? I wonder if you are with me in this. Yes? The sense of existence is here. Just this is enough. Do we need anything more than this? I exist. Consciousness is here. God is present. What else can we need? And who is there to name in this moment right now? God is here. It is you now. What complaint can you have?

This is the Leela, you see. You know, most of us in the Satsang have also seen this: I am. This is consciousness. In the light of this 'I am,' all this is happening. God is here. And yet I can go with this measly thought that says, 'My life is not good. What should I do with my life? What's going to happen to my life?' Who doesn't exist? It's God's life. This entire manifest creation is God's body and God is running it. Now, complain from this place. Lord, anything at all? You cannot, unless you again be listening to this voice as well as your mind's voice, or only the mind's voice. Even while this has been happening, you cannot do it. And it's good to check like this: what am I listening to? Even in Satsang, what am I listening to? They go, 'Here, it's God's life, but who else is here? I know this, so what should I do next?' These kind of questions come to the still, like that pesky mosquito which just doesn't go.

Ever since I was a kid, actually, mosquitoes have been very attracted to me. So I could be sleeping on that bed, you know, while growing up and thinking like this: everybody else is fine, I get up the next day with, you know, big mosquito bites. So I had a relationship with mosquitoes. And you realize that some days, no matter what you do—you put repellent, you put the fan on full, you keep the AC temperature completely low, you put all the things possible—and there will always be this one or two mosquitoes that will keep buzzing in your ear. They just don't go. And at the end, you just have to accept them and say, 'Okay, tonight is going to be like this.' And believe I'm saying all this in Satsang, but okay, just this to come today. Okay, this pesky guy, it doesn't exist, will keep saying something or the other, you know. But this is how this life is going to be. And then that acceptance, then actually automatically our attention moves away from the mosquito.

It is when we don't want it to be there that we constantly... 'Is it there? Is it there?' So even the time when it's not there, we are still troubled by it. You notice this? That when we want it to go away, then even the times in which it is not there, we are troubled by it. It is a very important point about the mind. Because many of us now, having been in Satsang, want the mind to go away. So even in the time, in the space between the thoughts, you're thinking, 'I hope it doesn't come back.' You know, what is the sense of concern that can be there? So it has got you even when it is not there. The sense of fear about it. The mosquito has you even when it is not there if you want the mosquito to go away. Is this example making any sense? No? Mosquitoes at Satsang? We're here to hear the pristine words of nectarine knowledge and you're hearing about mosquitoes and repellent. And it's good to see like this now, that if we come to this stage that 'I just want the mind to go away,' then we are living in this constant fear that 'I hope it doesn't come,' isn't it?

But if it is accepted—yes, this voice will say something or the other, but it doesn't really matter—it's burnt. Everywhere it could now is done, nowhere else left to burn it. Our mind has done this to us, or it will do. Whatever attachments we still hold on to will be burned. This is the functioning of life. So you'll see that there's nothing to be concerned about.

If we come to this stage that I just want the mind to go away, then we are living in this constant fear that 'I hope it doesn't come,' isn't it? But if it is accepted, yes, this voice will say something or the other, but it doesn't really matter. It's written. Wherever it could go now is done; nowhere else left to go. Our mind has done this to us, or it will do. Whatever attachments we still hold on to will be burned. This is the functioning of life. So you'll see that there's nothing to be concerned about it. And in this acceptance, you find that your attention is not so much getting taken up by the mind, not getting taken up by worry and guilt. Be open. This is open, and life is constantly trying to open you up, constantly. And if you're not open to this opening, then it feels like 'My life is so terrible.' And if you become open to everything, then you can say, 'Only life is so wonderful.' It becomes like that.

So right now you can audit and see: what is it that we are resisting? And all of us have some mental boundaries about what should or should not happen in life. And these boundaries life is constantly expanding. Sometimes we don't even know we have these boundaries and ideas, and life shows us in a mirror, 'See, this was still there.' You're getting whacked. And as long as we are open to this whacking, because in satsang this whacking is our prayer, you see? And many times we make the prayer and when it happens, we say, 'Why would this happen to me?' It is also an answered prayer. Everything is allowing you to let go of all concepts, even the holiest concepts. Letting go and coming to unassociated presence. Even those concepts which seemingly were in service to us, we realize that they never could be; just another concept. Better to make a list of all our sacred and holy concepts and burn them down, because no concept is true. And life shows us this openness to allow everything to be burnt.

So if you're holding on to some idea of who we are in a clenched fist with nothing inside—just an idea of who we are—life is constantly trying to open it up, you see? So the harder we resist this opening, the stronger the pain will be, the stronger the suffering will be. Very often when you hear this, it can feel like what I am saying is I want you to become passive. Just become passive. Just this opening means whatever is happening you just sit and let it happen to you; let life, let everybody come abuse you, say whatever. This is what the mind is painting, this picture for you sometimes, maybe. But this is not what I'm saying. We are open to even that which is flowing from this body. The action or the inaction which is flowing from here, there is openness and acceptance of that. And that is when you realize that there is nobody who is doing anything at all. All of this is just life moving.

See, there is no Ananta which is moving this hand. There's no Ananta that is speaking these words. There is no doer in that individual way. There is no experiencer also in that individual way. So all of this is a play of light and sound, time and space, which consciousness itself is doing for its own experiencing. And that consciousness is here. It feels, it sounds to me like a great cause of celebration actually. But if we are not at least in our celebrating, at least can we be just neutral about it? What is it really that we are suffering from? What is it that makes our life so terrible? If life has given us the space to be in this satsang right now, what a wonderful life it is. It has to be, to get Ganga in the energetic field of satsang. This is a wonderful life.

And this doesn't mean that I am advocating some sort of, you know, behavior which is just always like, 'Oh, I'm so happy.' Not like that. Not in that forced way, you see? Just in that openness, automatically the sense of joy and wonder can come. You don't have to force anything, that 'Oh, I heard today God is here so I must always smile.' It's not like that. Just to see this to be true and naturally let life unfold how it wants to is enough. So, openness like this to whatever life brings, and especially when it is in contradiction with any idea I have about myself.