Knowing Conceptually Is Not True Knowing of Direct Experience- 27th March 2016

And it doesn't look like anything. This is why the mind struggles so much. It wants to find the Self as if it is an object to be discovered. 'I'm looking for the Self, I'm looking for the Self.' And then you start to get this insight that it is nothing. I can ask, 'What did you see?' Because you wanted to see some magical object. What did you see? A vision of yourself with ten thousand hands and a huge form bigger than our mountain? Then even when this doesn't happen, you say, 'Okay, I accept that I really have no form, but at least there should be some byproduct in the world. There should be some joy or bliss, some radiance should come out of me.' Even this is not a true testament. It is not an object yet. I will be no clearer. You see also in the sages, with the body, it can seem like those appearing very natural. I've heard some of those sages in India are strictly... so all these things can appear momentarily. Does that mean that this is not freedom?

As long as we're checking back with our mental scheme, the mind says, 'Take the final jump off the cliff.' You know, something just completely surrender. Now advice is given, or get it going into our emotional state at all. This is here now. This is not my doing. So this is that is what I wanted. And mentally, that's my view. It's not true. This layer of intensity in your emotional state is not describing the reality of what you are. It is not talking about that which witnesses both of these. It is not even describing the presence in which they are here. Who is the mind talking about? This is why I said when we walked one step together, it is to see that person does not exist. So who will the mind be talking about? It is not for this phantom entity. So many times the mind is coming and saying, 'Now I know.' Don't even buy that mental conclusion. It only knows how to create a persona.

What happens is that for a long time we keep buying stories of unworthiness, and then when we're done with that, then we start buying the stories of our spiritual achievements. So it's neither. It is not great spiritual achievements. I mean, 'I am something, I have reached neutrality or radiance.' Anything we go with the mind, it's always like this. It does not understand the neutrality. It does not understand that it's neither end of the spectrum. And when I say that it is nothing, that you are this awareness, that is what you are. You notice the tendency of the mind to create a picture of this. It has to tell you that there is this dark space which is unlimited. Many of us get stuck in this visual. This one visual we've got stuck in for many, many years. Who is this? So even this visual the mind is bringing, can you see it? It is like you see it's white or black in the inner room. We go wrong. Nothing at all can be said about this.

So don't go with any visualization. Because if you have a visualization that you call awareness, or you call this unlimited space and you're just visualizing it, the mind is giving you this visual and says, 'That is it. I got it.' But that which witnesses the seeing itself, the Knowing itself, that is it. This has no shape, no form. For too long you have looked for some sort of form to discover the Self. As if, 'I will discover some luminous being that I am.' That which is the witness of all their appearance and disappearance—what does that look like? And if it looked like something, then who would see that? It couldn't look like anything at all. Then who would see that? This is what is meant by going to the source of reality.

There are also many in the world who have understood everything I'm saying until they have a beautiful conceptual framework. They love it. And it's not that we're going to demystify all the most confusing concepts. We've included all of this very simply. So this can be the disadvantage of that: the mind says, 'I have understood this and through this now this piece to the puzzle is still missing. So today I'll ask about this and get to that finished point.' It is not that. If all that happened as a result of this technology is moving together is that you started with the concept of being a person and ended with the concept of being a 'no-thing,' then I have not done my job. It is not a conceptual understanding. It is direct experience.

Whatever is being said here, you should be able to check for yourselves. Anyone should be able to check for ourselves and see whether this is your experience or not. And if it is not, you must stop me. Our purpose is not to just say, 'I agree with this.' We check together. All this mind resistance about 'this is too difficult' or 'this is something I can't understand'—who can understand this stuff mentally? It has to be your own direct seeing. This light of consciousness is appearing within my awareness. Then these words will not seem complex. This is already what is happening for you. If you try to understand, you remember what is being spoken, then it becomes a struggle. So use these words as pointers so you can check and validate. And now here also, if you say 'I check and I see something different,' I am always open to that. An open conversation. We open with the openness of being wrong also. We are not attached to any concept. See if you come and say, 'Let's look at this,' and we find something different, then maybe I will be... any ideas like 'I got it all,' all of that is rubbish. If there is a lot of it here, so we check. This is my promise. I'm not going to say this is the truth just because I say it. I understand why the mind is trapped.