Nothing Is More Special Than the Simplicity of Existence - 24th November 2017

I have no idea. The notion of completion, actually, I cannot relate to that at the moment. It's just... it just says nothing, nothing to me.

Because you said that there is something here which is incomplete, the seeing is incomplete. Suppose we didn't know this.

Yeah, I don't know if that is so, you know. I don't know if it is really like that. I just had to say something.

Do one experiment together. As we remain empty of notions... as we remain empty of notions, and then later we'll report about it whether it was complete or incomplete. In no completion or incompletion, is there any separation? No. Any duality? No. Impossible. This is it. We cannot say because that is... I mean, how is it for you? I mean, also I think everyone must have these different qualities, must experience the quality of experience.

Or experience... if it is a qualitative experience, then it is a function of attention, yes? If it is a qualitative experience, then it has nothing... no bearing on the recognition of the Self. I got that one, I'm not that... a little bit. And this is very important point. This is where many people get stuck, you see. So it can feel like that as a recognition of the Self is happening, the quality of experience has to change in some way. But the quality of experience is dependent on something which is changing, which is attention. And attention is a byproduct of my existence. So this quality... if we had no idea about what the quality should be or what should be perceived or not perceived, without this, empty of any of these ideas, we see that... okay, then the simplest notion to use is that I exist and I am this, even by the sense or not exist. So how does existence... and what do you mean when this is different? So you said, 'I got that point at least.' This, when the attention goes to... do you mean that these different qualities of experiencing myself is in this stuff?

Yes. So the way to look at this, the simple way to look at this, is go back to that cloud metaphor. So is the cloud... is the face in the cloud? I don't know. You see a cloud and you can get any shape in that cloud. So you can feel like, 'Oh, that's a face.' Is it a cloud? So someone can come and ask you, 'So is there a face in the cloud?' That quality that we are calling the face for now, yes, yes. But is it? So some might say, 'Yes, of course, we could just qualitatively experience as the face.' Another will say, 'There is no face, it was only cloud which is being perceived as face.' Now, my thing... well, we can take it very slowly. Suppose you are out and you see this beautiful face. You see Guruji's face. You see like this is a sign from God which is looking at me. So someone comes and says, 'Is there really a face in the cloud?' 'Yes, I see Guruji in the cloud.' So the qualitative experience is that you see it, yes. But in actuality, there is no separate substance called face. It is just the cloud itself, you see. It is not that there is a cloud, there is a cloud and now a new substance has come which is forming the face. It is just the shape of the cloud in a certain way which is appearing like a face. So this experiencing of... let's come back to my experience here. The experiencing of witnessing and experiencing of this 'I am not of this world, I'm just not of this world,' yes, that which is not of this world, it remains untouched by anything that might be happening in the qualitative experience. The Self remains untouched. Now, empty of notion, is this very apparent or it has to be looked for?

There is no notion, yes.

So as we are empty of notion, then does the fact that my qualityless Self is independent of whatever might be with qualities, does that have to be looked into or it is completely apparent?

It's completely apparent, yes.

You see? So it is completely apparent. The recognition of the Self is completely apparent when we are empty of all notions, you see. And then you see that the first... I asked you, is there any separation in that empty of notion? Is there any separation between that with quality and no quality? No. That's how you start to look at it, as it is one cloud, but qualitatively the face would be seen once I start to look at it in that way using my attention. It's like it continues to be the hand.

But I heard say this... so this difference in the way you can say how attention is... you see, the attention is moving. This, how the attention is in this, also makes... maybe you can say, is the cloud, so to say. For my experience, it seems more inside. The witnessing is more in... the attention is more in here. It's just... it's not so apparent.

So let me... okay, let me take a couple of minutes on this. For me actually, and this will be even different from how Guruji is using the term, but hearing your empty of isness, for me that signifies the Self. For me it signifies the Self which includes both the dynamic aspect and the non-dynamic aspect, which is that which is, is the Self. Now this Self has the qualitative aspect which we call beingness or consciousness, and it has the non-phenomenal, non-qualitative aspect which we call awareness. So this is what it translates to from my insight when I hear Guruji speak of the isness. Now this might be different for all of you. You might think it is beingness or you might feel it is the Self, but that is irrespective. That is the thing, the concept, you see. So if you look at this, that which is the Self, and then you see that there is that which is brought to the attention of the Self through the movement of attention itself. Only that which attention falls on is perceived, yes? So when we are talking about the qualitative experience, we are talking about that quality on which attention is falling. Now we look at the non-phenomenal aspect of the Self, we find that even to say your attention is not valid there because it is like the string has come back completely home. So that which was seeming moving towards is now not separated from this non-phenomenality there.

Of the Self, through the movement of attention itself, only that which attention falls on is firstly visited. Yes. So when we are talking about the qualitative experience, we are talking about that quality on which attention is falling. Now, when we look at the non-phenomenal aspect of the Self, we find that even to say your attention is there is not valid, because it is like the string has come back completely home. So that which was seeming to move outwards is now not separated from this non-phenomenality; therefore, we can't even say that there is something like attention. So the recognition of the non-phenomenal Self, the unchanging, the Absolute, is independent of the movement of attention. This is independent of attention.

Then what is the most primal object of our attention? The most primal object of our attention is the sense of existence, of being. This is where you can see it is like a primal quality; existence has come to play. So the feeling of the face arising in the cloud—the cloud will remain the cloud only—but this sense of I Am, as beingness, existence, has come. So when Maharaj can say, 'I just kept my attention on the sense of being and the truth became apparent,' this is the most primary, the most subtle object on which attention falls. Now, our experience is that as being, then the world arises with that. Then all these concepts of qualitative distinction start to arise. With this primary quality of being, then all of this—pleasure and pain, all these qualitative positions—they start to arrive. This world is the peak of qualities. But has anything happened to that Self without the movement of your attention?

Now what happens is that we have completely become this limited entity, but as we are simply empty of notions, which is the natural gift of this moment to all of us, you see that nothing has changed, no matter which qualities might seem to be appearing. Yes?

Totally with you. Only this one thing, this, you know—it is totally... I would, of course, in the witnessing, the attention is not... it is not that anymore. But Guruji always says this, he has this quote of someone like, you know, with this door which is going outside and inside, and between that my life is moving. And I would say it is like this, you know, and to turn... and also the attention is... even attention makes no sense in the Absolute anymore. It's just... but in a way, on the way to that, the attention is moving inside and then it is gone. You know what I mean? Yeah. And this is what, um, in the experience of it, the experience is somehow here. The mind makes something out of it in a way. I cannot say, you know, it's so subtle that we just had to speak it out. And I don't think the one that can be concerned about the quality of the experience has no control over the movement of attention, you see?

So attention works in coordination, you see, with consciousness. And all of these, again, are not just theoretical distinctions that we are making, or just conceptual distinctions we are making where actually no distinction has happened. But since we are talking about something which is apparent, so we can say that attention is moving in coordination with consciousness, and consciousness is moving it to whatever it wants to experience for itself. Now, the one who wants a particular experience, or is wondering whether freedom is this experience or that experience, that one has no play in the movement of attention, you see. So then you will start to see that whether the quality of the experience is full of pain, full of anger, full of all of these things arising, or the quality of the experience is peace, bliss, no pain, pleasure—as you remain motionless, you will see that it makes no difference to the Self. It makes no difference to you.

So there must not be a benchmark about the quality of the experience, because that is not a valid benchmark. So you say, 'How is it for you?' For me, it is the same as it is for you. The only thing which is missing is the lack of belief in the idea of 'me,' the idea of 'what's in it for me,' 'am I getting it?' You see, all these I am not concerned about. But the quality of the experience is the same. So there must be... I can't say about the quality of the experience, but as beliefs are gone from these notions, even attention gets withdrawn from them automatically. You don't have to work hard for it. And as attention is withdrawn from the mental sphere, then you find that if there is a qualitative change that has happened, it is that the feeling, the seeming of vibrancy in the phenomenal tasting of things, that seems to have gone up.

Because you know this, that as attention is split into two things—if I say think of a green-colored tree, imagine the green-colored tree and bring your attention there, and also keep your attention on my words—you will start to become blurry because attention is limitedly. So as attention has automatically withdrawn from the mental equations, we find that more attention is available for the tasting of these phenomenal appearances, and therefore this phenomenal appearance seems much more real and full of light compared to how it used to. Qualitatively, I can say this difference has happened. That has only happened because attention does not spend too much time on this mental scale of these mental notions.

You know, I don't have to feel right now that something got the answers I have, but I feel... so this experience what I have right now, but in the witnessing and really... and when really I just totally gone, and when it is so obvious that this world is... you are just not, not even here. You know, it is... I have no words for this experience. I know it is so... I would say it is so beyond everything. But my feeling is somehow that something took this experience and made, you know, made two out of it. I can, you know, I feel it and I know this is not true, but I cannot do anything about it. You know, there is the 'me' somehow here which is just not claiming... I would not take him, but something is going on is that, you know, this that in reality, two never got me, isn't it? It is just that the concept of separation got believed. But the good news is that whatever got believed is gone now.

All of this which naturally we have forgotten, we have to work towards bringing it back. As we can see, starting to ask the question, you can see that they struggle to bring it back. So what was the... so we leave that and we let all notions just come and go. Did you see any qualitative... there's the word qualitative distinction? Even matter is it signify and you know, appearance, nothing was lost. Distinction was no longer there because we are empty of notions. In that experience, nothing was lost. The powers of perception normally functioning, and that which witnesses even perception.

You know, so much concepts are coming up and now I can feel how something wants to hold on to this something, whatever. And when you're talking just before, you know, it's just where it gets really uncomfortable. It gets really uncomfortable and really that like the body is getting shattered apart here, you know. And so I know at least that I'm not, but... and I know, you know, I cannot really let go. Just like this is really something which... again, not because what you said first then what you said second contradicted what you said first, and what I do this, forget about it. And then you said, 'I know I can't just let it go.'

No, because knowing this is not bringing anything useful. Because when we don't really know, it is just a confirmation that we are taking. We don't know what all you might say. Go on. I know I wrote this, and then you might have actually let go of it forever. And if I ask you what can't you let go of, you might never remember that. You see, it is completely possible for it to happen like that. So better not to know. And even if you make the most humble confusion about ourselves, we move that we are not speaking the truth about the Self. It is a conclusion about the imaginary.

You know, I feel it when it is like this, but actually I need this conversation. You know, I just... Sarah says, 'No voice in my head is true, not even this one who says this.'

Very good, very good.

How long do I keep doing this joke, Father?

Oh, as long as consciousness is deriving some joy from it. I see it is often that in the seeming play of time, it can seem like a lot of time has gone in which we have believed these thoughts, you have believed this individuality and this limitation. A lot of time has gone in that. Now consciousness is savoring the letting go of this individual notion also, you see. Savoring every bit by bit, for some of us concept by concept. It is like being a household, but it lost exactly two minutes where we start hearing all the noise. So that's why I said to read immediately, jumped straight into the question so that you could utilize this time together.

So I was saying that how long do I keep doing this? It's very sweet because consciousness is enjoying the sweetness of the letting go of the falsehood with more and more freedom, more and more ease. Sometimes playing the game of back again, then free again, and she is playing. So there is no answer for how long. Actually, the true answer is it's over right now, until you decided to play it again.

I want to unmute, you know, because what happened is that I was getting a lot of complaining about the ones who are attending not treating themselves properly, and that's what changed the setting. And when I unmute all, then they cannot even argue with themselves because I was getting this complaint that I just, you know, making some noise and they not working there. So now when you want to unmute, maybe you can raise that—there's a raised hand option on Zoom—or you can just type it out that 'I want to speak' or something like that.

But I like that insight, which is that no voice in my head is true, not even this one. This is good. And when we start seeing it like this, then the mind is running out of room. Like oftentimes we see that we have to run out of room, we have to run out of bones, and then the truth is apparent. Now as we are starting to become so clear in our insight that even our spiritual conclusions are just an invitation for a position—they are not the truth—then the mind doesn't have many moves left. It will try, of course, it will keep trying, of course. But once our seeing is becoming so clear, that's why I'm very happy to see simple sentences like this which are not taking themselves too seriously. This is very good. Because many times when we have a spiritual experience, then we can say like, 'Oh, this is just like the best thing that I could have come up with.' Wait to see that even that thing is no more special than the simplicity of my existence.

So I like this. You say, 'Yes, I think that this voice is saying is true, including this little Self.' Or they would you bless me on my journey from Luque to Tiruvannamalai? I'm feeling some fear at the moment. All my blessings for this auspicious journey. I mean this journey of moving away from the mind into your heart. When you come to Tiruvannamalai, you become anchored to the heart and you find that one, the Absolute, the Self, it doesn't move. All my love and blessings for the auspicious pilgrimage that you are embarking on, and I will also see you soon.

But one said, 'Source of intellect is God Himself. Inquiry and inquirer are already in the being of God. Inspire him.' This chicken and egg issue can never be solved by inquiry. Enquirer has to dissolve its inquiry, dissolve the enquirer in openness and non-conceptual. But as long as the sense of trying to get to something or get somewhere, trying to solve the puzzle of the Self, any byproduct is the motive, then it can seem like it keeps an extra move. You are new in Satsang and you're a bit concerned about all this terminology that we used about awareness and consciousness and qualitative differentiation and what conceptual constructs... sometimes it can seem like there are...

Let its inquiry dissolve the enquirer. Then open with openness and non-conceptual being. But as long as the sense of trying to get to something or get somewhere, trying to solve the puzzle of the Self, and any byproduct is the motive, then it can seem like it keeps an extra move. You are a bit concerned about all this terminology that we use about awareness and consciousness and qualitative differentiation and what conceptual constructs these are. Sometimes it can seem like there are some concepts which are tiny, tiny tools. Let it be. If they keep to the distance, all you have to do is fine surgery using some fine tools of these concepts. But if that is not afflicting you, then you don't have to worry about it. Whatever concepts we are using are just tools so that we can be empty of all concepts. In your notionless existence, in this very moment, the truth of who you are is completely evident and there is nothing which is bound. All freedom is here. The layer of perception is happening effortlessly and the experience of this world is nothing but a play of perception. Existence is completely effortless and you are aware of this. No new conceptual baggage has to be picked up, you see.

The other day somebody asked me, 'How was your first meeting with Guruji?' and as we put on the YouTube video after satsang, I noticed that the first thing he told me once—because I told him, 'I don't even know what to ask, you have to help me with the first question'—and he said, 'Best not to move.' And it is how many years after meeting him? So that's all I'm saying in satsang, no? It's 'not to move.' He said it. You know, sometimes when we mess things up in our absence of conception, knowing knows itself. Because we had a deeply ingrained concept of the body which is actually non-existent. What is the body? Just super sensations, various sensations, some visual, some pain, some pleasure. All of this we've trapped together under one big notion called 'body.' Actually, there is no such thing.

Then let we say, 'Okay, well what is the world? Where is the world?' Just a bigger set of sensations which included all those previous ones and now new ones. What is it? Where is it? Just a set of perception that which we call a label and say 'world' or 'realm' or 'universe.' Then what is the Being? Just a sense of the primal perception, the primordial vibration. Suppose we didn't even have a concept for that Awareness that remains untouched by even the primordial vibration. Suppose you didn't have a concept even for that. All of these ideas, communication, constructs exist because we picked up one concept called 'I am the body' so strongly and 'I am the person' so strongly that we use these other constructs as thorns to remove all of it. So your freedom will not be an attachment to the concepts of awareness and consciousness, even these. No, the truth relies on none of it.

Maybe relook at the placement on Monday, the next one. Thank you all so much for being in satsang today. Guru Sri Mooji Baba Ki Jai. When are we having each and everyone?