Look as Awareness Rather Than Trying to Remove the Ego - 9th Sept. 2016

The identity actually is always misleading you as to the reality of what you are. So here in the statement that 'I know identity is playing,' it is that knowingness which is much larger than the display of the identity, you see? So don't have to feed it with too much concern that 'Why is this happening?' No, this is just very light. Sometimes it can be that some conditioning is playing out, and the best thing to do about that is to just laugh at it. You see, if you make it serious and say, 'Oh, these days it seems like it's not being dropped so easily,' maybe using that is adding to it. We just look at it and we say, 'Oh, this person seems to get some belief.' What is it really? Which is laughable. It's not... it's like, mmm.

But when you... but then it's like the feelings are another thing. And if I'm not buying the thoughts, then the feelings are there to be born.

Yeah, yes. But we are not to resist the feeling in any way. But what can be bought is only an interpretation of the feeling, isn't it? So there is no buying or selling happening. Just the attention can go to the feeling or attention can be pulled back from it. And I have never suggested that we should try and forcefully will attention away from the feeling. So it's important... it's okay to even be with that without buying the interpretation of it.

It isn't clear yet. It's just a recognition that I'm not the feelings. And then it's just... but even a movement, it's just a good clear... like, I'm not the thoughts, I'm not the feelings. And then even if they persist, it's like, that's okay as well.

Yeah. The force of this can be so strong it can seem like a tsunami, you see? So in that, the best amongst us sometimes can momentarily get lost in that, you see? But the point is not about what happened then, because that is gone, you see? It is always about just the right now, you see? And that is why we have this kind of sanctuary from Monday to Friday, that no matter what might be happening in this seemingly today life, at least for one hour, two hours, if you can come here, that's clear. Even now it's clearing up. And if something comes after we come up and we talk, then it seems to get lighter as this sanctuary, the really good everyday sanctuary of all of this past conditioning. It could be this... it can seem like we're getting open some days, it seems they rely... we can gently allow that to happen as long as you are coming to satsang, you see? These things, these releases, like I was telling her, don't even worry. Just feel that it went, it came and it went.

I think it's because there's been like these big openings and seeings in the past and then identity has slowly crept back in and there is this like... and a fear of that happening. And I just wanted to bring it to you.

Look, that won't be my problem. Yeah, so we won't let it go. It'll either be that or dissolved, whatever way it is going to happen. If it tries to come back, as long as you're here...

Can I just check as well? Say this identity, or I don't even know that this feeling of being the character right now... so I flow, I feel that kind of character. Okay, ease of that feeling exactly. And if I try and get to something else, that seems ridiculous. So it's just like, let this character play with these emotions, feelings, and thoughts, but know that I'm not that actor.

That's the checker guy checking to see that. Yes, no matter what play might be happening, that which is aware of the play remains untouched and unmoved by it. It's a beautiful thing, isn't it? Now if it seems like the character still has some choice, if you feel like there's something it wants to do to be rid of itself in some way, then just make the choice not to buy into your next thought. That's all that is needed to be done, you see? And if it feels there isn't, just enjoy the show.

I bet it can feel like there is a choice. How can she...?

If it feels like there is a choice, then make a choice not to believe your next thought, you see? If it feels like there is no choice, then nothing, enjoy the show.

I think it's like these feelings that come up in the body, they're so familiar to a person feeling, but there is like this pull to feel like, 'What is happening to me?' But actually, these feelings are just... yeah, they're just happening and disappearing and disappeared.