Free, Luminous, Transparent Awareness (Ashtavakra Gita 1.14-1.17) - 10th October 2016

So you see that again and again, over and over, in verse 15 already, ten times the sage must have said, 'You are this awareness,' you see? Now, what can we say about this awareness? Between free and bound, we'll say 'free.' Between transparent and opaque, you see, 'transparent.' Between moving and still, we'll say 'still.' Why I am making the comparison is because no attribute by itself applies to this awareness. That which is no-thing cannot have any attribute. But in this world of opposites, when you have to speak between the two, you will always be transparent and still. 'You are now and forever free, luminous, transparent, still.'

'The practice of meditation keeps one in bondage.' How? Because most often it is seen that along with the practice of meditation comes the identity of the practitioner. The bondage, as already has been explained, is only the idea that the person is the performer of an action. An action in itself cannot be bondage. An action itself also cannot remove bondage, yeah? So the action is just an appearance in this flow of consciousness, you see? So it is not the action in itself which is your bondage; it is to take up the identity 'I am the person,' and in this case, the identity that 'I am the practitioner' or 'I am the meditator' which is the bondage.

The only bondage is 'I am a person,' and anything which reinforces that idea... many of us have come across this idea that 'I am a great meditator, I have been meditating so much,' you see? So then it is taken on with the meditation or worship as a personal achievement; then that becomes bondage because it reinforces the false idea of personhood, you see? So again, an action which is done with the sense of doership actually reinforces the false idea of a person. So the sage was trying to say that taking meditation in the sense that 'If I meditate enough, you see, I have to bring my meditation practice from five hours to ten hours, and after I am able to do that, then I will be free,' you see? But in that, what is missed is this sense of personal doership. This is still 'I' which is trying to get somewhere, become better at something, and practice meditation as if this false one—like the cat, as I call it—will come to freedom for the cat, you see? So that is why the sage says, 'The practice of meditation keeps one in bondage.'

Verse 16: 'You are pure consciousness, the substance of the universe. The universe exists within you. Don't be small-minded.' 'You are the pure consciousness, the substance of the universe. The universe exists within you. Don't be small-minded.' 'You are pure consciousness.' We have been seeing for the last three days, when we check on our beingness, on our I-am-ness, what do we find? That it's now apparent: I am that I am. I am this pure consciousness. What is the meaning of pure consciousness? See, then you could argue, 'But sage, how can consciousness become impure? Why would you say pure consciousness? Is it possible for this consciousness, which he says is the supreme power, can that become impure?' Therefore, the meaning of 'pure' now is that it is unassociated. Being pure consciousness means it is not believing itself, pretending as if it has some personal attributes, personal conditioning. And it's coming to this I-am-ness. Often every Rishi aims at something: that anything that we say after 'I am' is a story. This is what it means.

Quick one, I want to run through a lot of... yes, it's okay? Yes, yes, yes. Now we are talking about... if you come to this realization 'I am that I am,' the materialization is that I am aware even as I am, you see? So I am, ultimately we can say, I am that which is this awareness, you see? But now the sage is talking about this realization of being. When that happens, 'I am that I am' is also beautiful, beautiful, coming into a beautiful realization, you see?

So we must not, like my Master says, don't feel that your beingness is some sort of a halfway house to freedom or something. The realization of beingness... they cannot suffer in this world. Well, then your life becomes a life of God. You are leading life as if you are that God presence, you see? So it's a beautiful realization also. 'You are pure consciousness, the substance of the universe.' Then this also we've been discussing last three days, that it is the I-am-ness that everything is made up of and everything appears within. So we have been checking, some of us, we checked this experience of the sound of the fan: is it only within me or is it outside me? And this means what we are speaking about now is the beingness itself.

So we saw that it is in the light of this consciousness that everything comes about, and it is within this consciousness, the screen as the one space of consciousness, where everything is getting played out. So both the light and the screen are the same, which is this one consciousness. So it is this beingness which is the substance of this manifest universe. Everything is encompassed within this being. 'The universe exists within you. Don't be small-minded,' you see? So this universe, the sage says from his insight, that all of this exists within this being, the space of being as sometimes you see. 'Don't be small-minded' means... which mind is this now? This mind. So in the Vedantic tradition, like we were discussing the other day, to use the term small mind and big mind: small mind means the ego mind, this layer for the person, and the big mind means this consciousness itself.

So this one is that in which everything exists. What does it mean to be small-minded? It will mean that you believe yourself to be that which the small mind is telling us we are. So 'don't be small-minded' only means don't behave as if, don't pretend as if... you can never become the smaller mind, but you have the power to pretend to be this separate individual identity. Verse 17, the sage says: 'You are unconditioned, changeless, formless. You are solid, unfathomable, and calm. Desire nothing. You are consciousness.' So then the unconditioned means that same when I said pure consciousness, that means unconditioned consciousness. And we've been looking at conditioning, and often I have said freedom is the recognition of the truth and the dropping of the false, which is the conditioning.

And both are now, you see? Although the dissolution of the conditioning seems like it is a time-bound exercise, but actually in the now it is already gone. But it is a habit of picking up the false conditioning which seems to take some time to dissolve, you see? 'Unconditioned, changeless.' We will discuss this. 'Formless.' Although all forms come from this, it itself is formless. 'You are solid.' And liquid and gaseous, you're all there is already, you see? So in a subservient definition, we can ignore for now. 'Unfathomable,' you see? Then 'fathom' used to be... the word 'fathom' was a measure, like a measuring unit, you see? So when they say 'unfathomable,' you see, by the mind, it means that it cannot be measured by the mind. It cannot be fathomed. How can that which contains the universe itself, can the mind fathom it? You see, the best it will give you is some visual. Visual is also part of this manifest universe. So it is not in the visualization or the imagination of the mind. We may not try to fathom this.

But you are aware of your existence, therefore you must be something which is greater than the mind, you see? The mind will give a circle. There is awareness. I am an experience that there are states like sleep state where there is no manifest creation, there is nothing at all. And then for some unexplained reason, for some unfathomable reason—although my favorite one is entertainment—there is the birth of this sense of being, the sense that I exist. Now, if awareness was all there is, then what must this being be made up of? Awareness only. We have had the direct experience that there is nothing, but I am there to have that experience, you see? Therefore, this sense of being also must be just another form of this one substance, which is awareness alone.

That's why often I say that in reality there is no difference between awareness and consciousness, but in qualitative seeming, it seems like they are different. Just like in reality there is no difference between water and ice, you see? But if somebody splashes water on you versus throws an ice cube, you see, there is a difference, isn't there? In the qualitative experience. So fundamentally there is no difference, but in the qualitative seeming, it looks like there is a difference. So when what happens, this consciousness is now present, we have already seen that there has been... so don't... my advice is don't listen to these words as if they are beautiful, poetic, you see? It can be, can be very attractive that way. But you must take the words and you must use them for your direct checking. Is this true for me right now? Is it not true that everything that is being experienced, is it being experienced only as you see here? 'Here' means not constrained by the body, but here within my being, in the light of my being. We must get...

Awareness is now present. We have already seen that there has been, so don't—my advice is you don't listen to these words as if they are beautiful, poetic. You see, it can be a very attractive way, but you must take the words and you must use them for your direct checking. Is this true for me right now? Is it not true that everything that is being experienced is being experienced only as—you see, 'here' means not constrained by the body, but here within my being, in the light of my being? We must get the direct experience of these things as this sage is speaking them. You see, so you are this unfathomable one. Now, in the realm of appearances as it comes, with everything coming, one of the appearances is also this mind, the energetic construct of thoughts. Sober one used to say a bundle of thoughts is the mind. You see, also bundling similar energies like imagination, memory, all these things—let's call it mind.

So this one amazing metaphor—do not take it too literally—is like the grandson. There was awareness within which this consciousness came into shape. As many, many, many thousands of energetic forms came, they also came this energetic construct called the mind. It is the grandson of awareness, isn't it? Now, can the grandson tell me authoritatively where the grandfather was born? No way from this conceptual—you see, because it was not there. That which is later cannot profess the birth of that which is before, isn't it? So that is why we cannot rely on this mind to be our guide to the truth. You don't need that mind because you were there, you are there, you are that. So the mind, when it tries to play the guide, we must ignore that, especially in the spiritual sense, because it cannot be fathomed by the mind. It will give you some cheap representations, paintings of awareness and paintings of consciousness, but those will never represent in reality what you are. You see, that is why it is important to make the point that it is unfathomable. Unfathomable by what? By the mind.

Somebody have a good idea about this room? It's really surprisingly cool. This would say you are solid, unfathomable, calm. We shall look at the original Sanskrit and see what it is concerned with. Yes, this is a good one. It is not concerned by the play of the manifest universe. You see, this is a good one. So in the sense of—even 'aloof' is not the best word for it, but aloof like 'I'm so cool about things, it doesn't matter to me.' You will be like that. So, aloof or unconcerned by the workings of this manifest universe, not trying to go towards a particular outcome at all. It's very good to see. My feeling is you are always to read things fresh. When I am also reading, I enjoy anything. Okay, desire nothing. You are consciousness. Now, as consciousness, what could you desire? Everything that is appearing is already within you. What lack can you have? What discontentment can you have? That is why it is said that this discovery 'I am that, I am this I Am,' you see, is full of contentment, joy, peace, Ananda. That is why it is like this.

But allow yourself to settle into this. Don't mix it with desire so quickly. The mind will come and say, 'Okay, if you really saw it, where is the bliss? Where is the bliss?' Yeah, so that itself then becomes from unconditioned to conditioned. Momentarily, we still get or take on the persona of somebody who wants to buy products. Consciousness is not asking for the bliss. So as you allow yourself to relax into this, into this simple allowing, you find that there is no 'what's in it for me?' The sense of desire starts to dissolve. And as the pull, this magnetism of this maha-mantra of the ego, 'what's in it for me?' starts to dissolve, you find that your true servants—your true servants of love, peace, joy—all these appear to serve you. So we don't have to desire anything.

If it is still about desire, all desire is personal. And that way, even the desire for freedom ultimately is personal. But I see sometimes that it is—if you have to have a desire, then at least in the spectrum of auspiciousness, have the desire for freedom, because at least with this one you will come to the end of desire. If it is a true search, you will come to the end of desire. Nothing else, you see. 'Okay, this one I got this, now what next? I got this, then what next?' When you come to the dissolution of that which is false, then the 'what next' will drop. You see, 'what's in it for me?' 'what next?'—all this starts to drop. When life seems full of ease, even if it seems full of activity, even if strong events are happening around you, you will find that it is full of ease. You will discover that as consciousness.